The Wrong Shoes
Why am I so bad at buying shoes? I don't get it. I always enter the shoe shop with the confidence of a man who has learned his lesson. I leave the premises about 75% sure that I've made the right decision, then a few days later I realise that I've fallen into the same trap again. They're too big, too small, uncomfortable, bad quality or just plain ugly.
I am now the owner of quite a few pairs of shoes and I can honestly say that I'm not completely happy with any of them. Let's go through them:
Black semi-casual ones – I'm wearing them now. They have a red spot on the back, the black faded within a week, I can't wear them with jeans and they're ugly.
Mizuno tennis shoes – Brilliant shoes for squash. Great quality and they look fine. Oh yeah, but they were a size too small, made my toenail die and then take six months to drop off completely, giving me the added complication that I shouldn't wear thongs for fear of grossing people out.
Rod's hand-me-downs – They were too small for the big fella so I scooped them up. A bit grubby and needed a wash. I put them in the washing machine and now they just sit there looking a bit mangled.
Black Julius Marlows (go on, say it in Tony Greig's voice) – not too bad, but they're clearly about 5 years old now and need a bit of stitching here and there.
Squash shoes from Mong Kok market – I know you can't expect too much for 8 Aussie bucks, but the 'Blister Maker 2000' can be a little rough on the old soles.
Asics Gel – My only great shoe purchase over the years. Unfortunately unless you're Jerry Seinfeld you can't really wear runners with jeans.
Thongs – They're ok, but it took four other dud pairs to find the right one. Oh, and they're quickly falling apart.
High heels – Stunning, but honestly, I just can't walk in those things.
Can anybody help me? I need an all purpose shoe that's dressy enough to wear to work (smart casual is ok) and casual enough to wear out. I want answers! I want to be as satisfied with my next pair of shoes as I am with my brilliant 'France' boxer shorts.
4 comments:
nicko, surely the Kok specials aren't letting you down? Value for money they must be the best valued losers in your extensive and questionable shoe rack?
Without a doubt the best valued losers in my pitiful collection. Their hidden strength is that they're still good as a casual shoe despite their difficulties on the squash court. Come to think of it, maybe the shoes are fine. Maybe I just need an excuse for the towelling you give me every time we step on the court!
mate you do sound at your wits end with those shoes...you could get some scissors, take the squash shoes, give them a trim round the toes - thong style - then glue an orthodic sole in, then paint them light brown...covered all bases - sport, chillin, work
Where have you been all my life?
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